Frame 框架

Frame is everything. Always be aware of the subconscious balance of whose frame in which you are operating. Always control the Frame, but resist giving the impression that you are.

框架就是一切。始终要注意你所处的潜意识平衡的框架。始终控制框架，但不要给人留下你在控制的印象。

The concept of “frame” is yet another ephemeral idea that had need of a term in the very beginnings of the great masculine awakening that’s become the ‘community’. If memory serves I think it may have been Mystery who first picked up on what’s really a very rudimentary and well established psychological principle. In psych terms, frame is an often subconscious, mutually acknowledged personal narrative under which auspices people will be influenced. One’s capacity for personal decisions, choices for well-being, emotional investments, religious beliefs and political persuasions (amongst many others) are all influenced and biased by the psychological narrative ‘framework’ under which we are most apt to accept as normalcy.

“框架”的概念是另一个在伟大的男性觉醒初期需要一个术语的短暂想法，这种觉醒已经成为了‘社区’。如果我没记错的话，我认为可能是 Mystery 首先意识到了这实际上是一个非常基本且早已确立的心理学原则。在心理学中，框架是一个常常是潜意识的、相互认可的个人叙事，人们会在其影响下受到影响。个人的决策能力、对幸福的抉择、情感投资、宗教信仰和政治倾向（以及其他许多方面）都受到我们最有可能接受为常态的心理叙事“框架”的影响和偏见。

The concept of frame covers a lot of aspects of our daily lives, some of which we’re painfully aware of, others we are not, but nonetheless we are passively influenced by frame. What concerns us in terms of inter-gender relations however is the way in which frame sets the environment, the ambience, and the ‘reality’ in which we relate with both the woman we sarge at a bar and the relationship with the woman we’ve lived with for 20 years. One important fact to consider, before I launch into too much detail, is to understand that frame is NOT power. The act of controlling the frame may be an exercise in power for some, but let me be clear from the start that the concept of frame is who’s ‘reality’ in which you choose to operate in relation to a woman. Both gender’s internalized concept of frame is influenced by our individual acculturation, socialization, psychological conditioning, upbringing, education, etc., but be clear on this, you are either operating in your own frame or you’re operating in hers. Also understand that the balance of frame often shifts. Frame is fluid and will find its own level when a deficit or a surplus of will is applied to change it. The forces that influence that lack or boost of will is irrelevant – just know that the conditions of an operative framework will shift because of them.

框架的概念涵盖了我们日常生活的诸多方面，其中一些我们深有体会，另一些则未曾察觉，但我们仍被动地受其影响。在两性关系中，我们关注的是框架如何设定环境、氛围以及我们与女性互动的“现实”，无论是酒吧里搭讪的女性，还是相伴二十年的伴侣。在深入细节之前，一个重要的事实需要明确：框架并非权力。控制框架的行为对某些人而言或许是权力的体现，但请从一开始就清楚，框架的概念是指你在与女性互动时选择遵循谁的“现实”。两性内化的框架概念受到个体文化适应、社会化、心理条件、成长背景、教育等因素的影响，但务必明确，你是在自己的框架中运作，还是在她的框架中。同时，要理解框架的平衡常常会发生变化。框架是流动的，当施加改变的意愿不足或过剩时，它会自行调整至适当水平。 影响意志力缺乏或增强的力量是无关紧要的——只需知道操作框架的条件会因此而改变。

Pre-LTR Frame 预左到右框架

Often I’ll see forum posts lamenting some loss of frame – “Lost the frame, how do I get it back?” A lot of times guys believe that because a woman initially gave them IOIs or was ‘really into them’ in the beginning that they had ‘frame’. This is another unfortunate misconception about frame – and I partly blame the PUA culture for it – but frame is not interest level (IL). Simply because a woman is attracted to you does not mean she’s ready to ‘enter your reality’. Her entering your frame may become a byproduct of that attraction, but it by no means guarantees it. In truth, under today’s social environment, I would expect a woman to resist tooth and nail from rushing into a man’s frame. This is why women have psychologically evolved a subconscious propensity to shit test; to verify the legitimacy of a man’s frame.

我经常看到论坛帖子哀叹框架的丧失——“失去了框架，我该如何找回它？”很多时候，男人们认为因为一个女人最初给了他们 IOI 或者一开始“真的很喜欢他们”，他们就有了“框架”。这是关于框架的另一个不幸的误解——我部分归咎于 PUA 文化——但框架不是兴趣水平（IL）。仅仅因为一个女人被你吸引，并不意味着她已经准备好“进入你的现实”。她进入你的框架可能是这种吸引力的副产品，但这绝不能保证。事实上，在当今的社会环境中，我预计女性会竭尽全力抵制匆忙进入男人的框架。这就是为什么女性在心理上进化出了一种潜意识的倾向来进行废物测试；以验证男人框架的合法性。

Most Game incongruencies develop around a guy’s inability to establish frame and opting in to a woman’s frame. What’s ironic is that on a base level, we understand frame imbalances instinctually. If you feel like you’re being led on, or being made to wait for sex, you’re operating in her frame. Are you in the ‘friend-zone’ or did you accept an LJBF rejection? You’re in her frame.

大多数游戏中的不一致性源于一个男人无法建立框架并选择进入女人的框架。具有讽刺意味的是，在基本层面上，我们本能地理解框架的不平衡。如果你觉得自己被引导，或者被要求等待性行为，你就是在她的框架中运作。你是处于“朋友区”还是接受了 LJBF 的拒绝？你是在她的框架中。

Ideally, you want a woman to enter your reality. Her genuine (unnegotiated) desire for you hinges upon you covertly establishing this narrative for her. Famous men, men with conspicuous affluence and status, and men with overwhelming social proof have very little difficulty in establishing frame – they can’t help but establish frame in a very overt fashion. A woman already wants to enter that world. She want’s an easy association with a man who’s unquestionably a proven commodity and offers her hypergamy not just a actualized fantasy, but also a high degree of personal affirmation in being the one a Man of this grandeur would choose above other women.

理想情况下，你希望一个女人进入你的现实。她对你真正的（未经协商的）欲望取决于你暗中为她建立这个叙事。著名的男人、拥有显赫财富和地位的男人，以及拥有压倒性社交证明的男人，在建立框架方面几乎没有困难——他们不可避免地以非常明显的方式建立框架。一个女人已经想要进入那个世界。她想要与一个毫无疑问是经过验证的商品的男人建立简单的联系，并为她提供不仅仅是实现的幻想，还有高度的个人肯定，即她是一个男人会选择高于其他女人的女人。

Unfortunately, you and I are not this Man, he’s a feminine idealization. However it’s important to understand how hypergamy plays into establishing frame. The Man who impassively accepts women’s hypergamous natures has a much easier time establishing frame from the outset. You or I may not be that be that famous guy with an automatic, overt frame control, but we can be by order of degrees depending upon our personal conditions and the conditions of the women with whom we choose to associate. The default pedestalization of women that men are prone to is a direct result of accepting that a woman’s frame is the only frame. It’s kind of hard for most ‘plugged in’ men to grasp that they can and should exert frame control in order to establish a healthy future relationship. This is hardly a surprise considering that every facet of their social understanding about gender frame has always defaulted to the feminine for the better part of their lifetimes. Whether that was conditioned into them by popular media or seeing it played out by their beta fathers, for most men in western culture, the feminine reality IS the normalized frame work. In order to establish a healthy male-frame, the first step is to rid themselves of the preconception that women control frame by default. They don’t, and honestly, they don’t want to.

遗憾的是，你我并非此人，他是一个女性理想化的化身。然而，理解择偶偏好如何影响框架建立至关重要。那位冷静接受女性择偶本性的男人，从一开始就更容易确立自己的框架。你我或许不是那位拥有自动、显性框架控制力的名人，但我们可以通过逐步调整，根据个人条件及所选择交往女性的条件来实现这一点。男性对女性的默认神化，直接源于接受女性框架为唯一框架的观念。对于大多数“融入”社会的男性而言，理解并实施框架控制以建立健康未来关系，确实颇具挑战。这并不奇怪，毕竟在他们一生的大部分时间里，社会对性别框架的理解始终默认倾向于女性。无论是流行媒体的影响，还是从他们顺从的父亲那里观察到的行为，对西方文化中的多数男性来说，女性现实就是被正常化的框架。 为了建立健康的男性框架，第一步是摒弃女性默认掌控框架的偏见。她们并非如此，坦白说，她们也不想如此。

Post LTR Frame 后置 LTR 框架

In most contemporary marriages and LTR arrangements, women tend to be the de facto authority. Men seek their wive’s “permission” to attempt even the most mundane activities they’d do without an afterthought while single. I have married friends tell me how ‘fortunate’ they are to be married to such an understanding wife that she’d “allow” him to watch hockey on their guest bedroom TV,…occasionally.

在大多数当代婚姻和 LTR 安排中，女性往往是事实上的权威。男性在尝试甚至是最平凡的活动时，都会寻求妻子的“许可”，而这些活动在他们单身时是毫不犹豫地进行的。我有已婚的朋友告诉我，他们多么“幸运”能娶到这样一位善解人意的妻子，她会“允许”他在客房的电视上偶尔看冰球比赛。

These are just a couple of gratuitous examples of men who entered into marriage with the frame firmly in control of their wives. They live in her reality, because anything can become normal. What these men failed to realize is that frame, like power, abhors a vacuum. In the absence of the frame security a woman naturally seeks from a masculine male, this security need forces her to provide that security for herself. Thus we have the commonality of cuckold and submissive men in westernized culture, while women do the bills, earn the money, make the decisions, authorize their husband’s actions and deliver punishments. The woman is seeking the security that the man she pair-bonded with cannot or will not provide.

这些只是几个男人在婚姻中完全受妻子控制的例子。他们生活在她的现实中，因为任何事情都可能变得正常。这些男人没有意识到的是，框架，就像权力一样，厌恶真空。在没有女性自然从男性伴侣那里寻求的框架安全感的情况下，这种安全感的需求迫使她为自己提供这种安全感。因此，在西方文化中，我们常见到被戴绿帽和顺从的男人，而女人则负责账单、赚钱、做决定、授权丈夫的行为并给予惩罚。女人在寻求与她配对结合的男人无法或不愿提供的安全感。

It is vital to the health of any LTR that a man establish his frame as the basis of their living together before any formal commitment is recognized. As I stated in the beginning, frame will be fluid and conditions will influence the balance, but the overall theme of your relationship needs to be led and molded by you. Even very influential, professional, intellectualizing women still crave the right man to establish his frame in her life. They may fight it bitterly, but ultimately it’s what will make for the best healthy balance she can achieve. There’s a growing undercurrent of mid-life women questioning and regretting their past decisions to remain single into spinsterhood. And for all their late game rationalizations, the one thing they still simply refuse to accept is acknowledging that a man’s frame, the frame their “fierce independence” wouldn’t allow for, was exactly the salve their egos so desperately wants now later in life.

对于任何长期关系（LTR）的健康发展，男人在正式承诺之前确立自己的框架作为共同生活的基础至关重要。正如我在开头所述，框架将是流动的，条件会影响平衡，但你们关系的整体主题需要由你来引领和塑造。即使是非常有影响力、职业化、善于理性思考的女性，仍然渴望一个能在她生活中确立框架的合适男人。她们可能会激烈反抗，但最终，这正是她们能实现最佳健康平衡的关键。越来越多的中年女性在质疑并后悔自己过去选择单身直至独身生活的决定。尽管她们在后期会进行各种合理化解释，但有一件事她们仍然坚决不愿承认，那就是男人的框架，那个她们“强烈独立”所不容的框架，恰恰是她们在晚年生活中如此迫切渴望的慰藉。

Gentlemen, you will establish frame in any monogamous relationship you have. You will enter her reality or she will enter yours.

先生们，你们将在任何一夫一妻制关系中建立框架。你们将进入她的现实，或者她将进入你的现实。